In April 2019, I arrived at the Hoffman Process knowing something needed to shift. I’d spent years carrying responsibility for others — at home, at work, and within my family — while often neglecting my own wellbeing. I wanted to understand myself more deeply, reclaim confidence, and release patterns that were limiting my happiness.
During the Process, I saw how much of my early conditioning had shaped my adult life: staying quiet to keep the peace, taking care of others before myself, striving for harmony, and carrying grief that I’d never fully expressed. I finally allowed myself to feel everything I had pushed aside.
Throughout the week, I met patterns that had followed me for years: perfectionism, people-pleasing, fear of failure, self-criticism, and the belief that love required self-sacrifice. As the week unfolded, I began to reconnect with my essence — the intuitive, compassionate, resilient version of myself that had always been there.
After the Process, my relationships softened and deepened. I noticed more clarity, more honesty, and a kinder internal voice. Even long-held grief eased. The reunions with my Process group in the months that followed reminded me how powerful it is to grow alongside others.
But life continued, and with it came challenges. Work disappointments, family stress, uncertainty, and the pressures of early 2020 left me feeling disconnected from the practices I had built. Old patterns resurfaced: self-doubt, worry, withdrawing, and losing trust in myself.
By the time I joined the 3-day online refresher course called the Graduate Virtual Intensive, I knew I needed support. The GVI – which replaced the in-person Q2 refresher during lockdown – helped me reconnect with the Hoffman tools: awareness, compassion, choice. I looked honestly at the patterns that had resurfaced and remembered what it felt like to live from my essence rather than fear.
From that reconnection came clarity:
- I want meaningful, fulfilling work.
- I want healthier, deeper relationships.
- I want stability and a sense of home.
- I want routines rooted in respect for my body and wellbeing.
- I want joy, not just productivity.
- I want to allow vulnerability and real connection.
In the years since 2020, my life has evolved in beautiful ways. I’ve trained in CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) and EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing), supporting others through the same principles of awareness and compassion that helped me. I’ve celebrated my body and growth through a 40/40 photo project, honouring the strength and resilience that carried me through this journey.
Today, I continue to use the tools from the Process and the GVI. I notice my patterns more quickly. I pause more often. I treat myself with greater kindness. I’m cultivating connection, rebuilding confidence, and choosing the life I want to live — consciously and compassionately. The Hoffman Process, the reunions, and the Graduate Virtual Intensive gave me a map back to myself. I keep walking that path, one mindful step at a time.
To find out more about the 40/40 project by photographer Claire Howes, click here – Zina’s session is highlighted here
To find out more about Zina’s work as an accredited CBT and EMDR therapist, visit her LinkedIn profile here
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